Posted February 15, 2010 - 11:08 PM
TONIGHT: “Jerry! Jerry! Jerry!” Jerry Springer is the guest host of Raw tonight, the go-home show for the Elimination Chamber PPV. Like on Smackdown, the Chamber participants will be paired off in one-on-one matches tonight, as decided by last week’s guest host, Carl Edwards: Sheamus vs. Randy Orton, Triple H vs. John Cena, and Kofi Kingston vs. Ted DiBiase. Speaking of Cena, Batista will be on the show to address Cena’s comments from last week. Also, more hype for the Maryse vs. Gail Kim Divas Title match at the Chamber will likely go down tonight. And follow-upon Shawn Michaels’ melt-down and the Bret Hart vs. Vince McMahon feud as well.
-Aw, I was hoping to hear the woman announcer on the dog show throw it to Monday Night Raw!
-WWE Open.
-Cold open to the arena, where Justin Roberts introduced the Iowa Color Guard. In honor of President’s Day, they had 15-year old Allison Ewell sing the National Anthem from the top of the stage. Not sure the spelling of her name as they couldn’t be bothered to give her chyron.
-Raw Open.
-There’s the open we’re used to! Lots o’ fireworks, Michael Cole, and Jerry Lawler welcomed fans to the Wells Fargo Center in Des Moines, Iowa.
-Tonight, Raw guest host Jerry Springer will reveal WWE Superstars’ most intimate relationships!
-Plus, Bret Hart will address the WWE Universe tonight.
-They showed the parking lot outside the arena, awaiting the entrance of Batista. He’ll respond to John Cena tonight.
(1) Sheamus vs. Randy Orton
During Orton’s entrance, Cole talked about the other Chamber participants in action tonight. Orton caught Sheamus with an uppercut in the corner after Sheamus showed off a bit too much. In response, Sheamus hammered away on Orton in the corner following a collar-and-elbow tie-up. “RKO” chants from the crowd. Early cover after a knee to the back of the head for a two-count by Sheamus. Sheamus missed a pump kick and Orton tried an RKO, but the champ escaped and bailed to ringside. They went to break about 1:20 into the match.
[Commercial Break]
The show returned with Orton giving Sheamus the ol’ Garvin Stomp. Sheamus went back on offense soon after, though. Legacy was at ringside at this point, by the way. Orton gave Sheamus his patented back-breaker and began to stalk Sheamus. RKO, but Sheamus again ducked, thought it looked pretty ugly. At least Randy held it together. To the outside where Sheamus had Orton up for a powerslam, but Sheamus was shoved into the ring post. As Orton went inside the ring, Ted DiBiase tried to attack Sheamus, but Sheamus fought him off. Rhodes took him out from behind and the ref saw it, and called for the DQ.
Winner: Sheamus, via DQ, at 8:34. Hey, the referee’s are really coming out looking competent in this feud/angle! Sheamus again can’t get a decent clean win.
After the match, Rhodes and DiBiase went into the ring to plead their case, and Teddy appeared to blame Rhodes. Orton gave Rhodes the RKO to a big pop. Sheamus went on the attack and booted DiBiase in the face, only to be RKO’d by Orton.
-The main event this evening will be Triple H vs. John Cena.
-Bret Hart was walking backstage. He’ll address the WWE Universe next.
[Commercial Break]
-They showed the exterior of the Iowa Capital Building.
-Cole and Lawler talked on camera about Bret Hart’s return and Vince McMahon’s attacks on him. They went to footage of last week’s main event segment, featuring John Cena, Vince McMahon and Bret Hart.
-Justin Roberts introduced Bret “The Hitman” Hart. Bret said it’s no real shock that Vince McMahon isn’t in the building this evening. He said if he had, he would’ve greeted Vince at the airport, at his hotel and/or at the building. Not sure which he meant. Anyway, he said he wanted to finish things once and for all with McMahon. Good crowd reaction for Hart, including a “Bret” chant. Hart said he tried to bury the hatchet with Vince, but Vince didn’t want it. Now they’re giving him the “what” chant. Hart said that Vince’s words that Bret deserved to be screwed are echoing in his head. He said he thought Vince deserved to have the holy hell beat out of him. He called McMahon the World’s greatest liar. Hart said that it would’ve been so sweet for him to have one last victory at Wrestlemania, but it’s not to be, because Vince lied about that too. Man, who’s that annoying guy in the crowd that some mic keeps picking up? Bret said he wanted to thank all of the WWE Superstars in the locker room for welcoming him back. And he thanked the WWE Universe for welcoming him back. He also thanked John Cena. He also wanted to take the time to say goodbye. He thanked the fans, set the mic down and left the ring. Bold prediction: I don’t think we’ve seen the last of HIM!
-Cole and Lawler discussed what just happened.
-They went to Bret in the back, walking in the hallway. He met up with Kofi Kingston and Kofi thanked him. Then he walked by Jack Swagger and Alicia Fox. He wished him good luck and Fox hugged him. Even Primo came up to him and asked him if he was really leaving. Bret said to say hello to his father for him. Evan Bourne and Gail Kim also gave Bret some dap. They went to King and Cole talking again, then back to Bret, this time, walking with Cena. Bret wished someone good luck, and he got into a car (or possibly limo). Cena tried to talk Bret out of walking out, but Bret wasn’t having it. Cena turned around and started walking. All of a sudden, we heard the sound of a car backing up and Bret screaming in pain. Cena ran back to see what happened, and the car backed into the limo door, where Bret’s leg was caught in it. Some woman got out of the car and she got a brow-beating from Cena. Hey, that’s just reinforcing negative stereotypes about women drivers! Primo, Kim, Bourne and the WWE trainer checked on him. He was still mostly in the car and we could only see his leg being worked on. They pulled him out the other side as the bystanders made worried faces. “All you had to do was close the door Bret, but you were too damn selfish! That’s why I backed my leg into your leg!” Sorry, that came into my head for some reason. They put him in an ambulance and took him away. Another plot twist!
[Commercial Break]
-They showed what just happened, with Bret getting blind-sided by a car. Cole said they’d try to keep us updated on Bret’s condition throughout the show.
(2) The Miz & The Big Show vs. MVP & Mark Henry
Yes, they had a mash-up of Miz’s and Show’s theme songs. I liked Jericho and Show’s better, personally. MVP got the better of Miz at the outset, including kicking him in the head. Miz was sent to the outside with that move, and they went to break 45 seconds in.
[Commercial Break]
Miz was trying to keep MVP away from making the tag to Mark Henry. Miz took a swipe at Henry, so MVP back body-dropped Miz. Henry came in and gave the World’s Strongest Slam to Miz. Big Show came in to break up the pin with a legdrop. Tag to Show but Henry peppered him with rights. Splash in the corner and a slam attempt, but he couldn’t do it. Show turned it into a DDT instead. Show tried to walk over Henry and nearly tripped over him. Cole tried to cover by saying Henry attempted to grab Show’s leg, but anyone paying attention would realize that wasn’t the case. Show missed his Vader bomb, which allowed Henry to make the tag. MVP came in and hit his signature offense. Show superkicked him in a move that showed a lot of light. Miz tagged in and only got two on a pin attempt, but MVP rolled him up in a surprise for a three-count.
Winners: MVP & Henry, at 6:34. An OK match, and I assume this starts a feud between these two teams.
-They showed clips of the Jerry Springer show, and up next, he’ll reveal WWE Superstars’ most intimate relationships.
[Commercial Break]
-Justin Roberts introduced Jerry Springer, who came out with his Springer bodyguards. I think he came out to the Springer theme, but I honestly don’t know. They even have the JerryTron 5000 in the ring! Springer said tonight, WWE Superstars’ most intimate relationships will be revealed. Has Springer’s voice always been that squealy-sounding. Kelly Kelly was the first to come out. Jerry told Kelly it was great to have her on. He said he’s a fan of the show, but she hasn’t wrestled lately. Kelly had a confession- she’s pregnant! Fans booed that. Springer asked who the baby daddy was. Kelly said she wasn’t sure, as there are a lot of possibilities. I think this is more like Maury. Kelly said she might know…..and Santino Marella’s music hit. Santino, in his cobra t-shirt, came out. Kelly looked very happy. Marella called Jerry “Maury,” and said it’s true, that he is the father. Springer said that wasn’t exactly true. Kelly said that when Santino was sleeping, she needed someone to “finish the job.” That’s disgusting. Marella then started arguing with Kelly and Michael Cole interrupted. He said that was he and Kelly’s secret and he called her a hussy. Then Lawler said she wasn’t talking about Cole….she was talking about him! Marella got the crowd started in a “Jerry, Jerry” chant. Springer said Kelly is a bit old for Lawler and that he usually picks up his women on the playground. Marella interjected, saying like GrandMaster Sexay, Lawler and Kelly’s kid will be a screw-up! Then The Bella Twins came out.
They had a confession for Jerry too. Nikki shouted that her sister Brie was a man. The two of them started catfighting, but security broke them up. Springer asked about Kelly again, and Chris Masters came out. This is gonna piss Eve off. Kelly said she couldn’t help herself and Springer told Masters to put on a bra, the same thing Ozzy did. Eve stormed out and she got in Kelly’s face, asking what Kelly was doing with her man. Another catfight, and again Marella and Lawler led the crowd in a “Jerry, Jerry” chant. Masters told Eve she wasn’t getting the job done, that’s why he had to go to Kelly. Eve had a secret too- she has been cheating on Chris with someone who is a whole lot more man than Masters. It was The Great Khali. He lifted Eve in his arms and they kissed. Security had to hold Masters back from attacking. I would actually say this has been one of the more normal Springer episodes. I hope we get his “final thought.” Marella wanted to know who the father was. Jerry had the results of the paternity test. I’m guessing it’s Hornswoggle. Springer said he didn’t know how to pronounce this, so Marella raised his unibrow and shouted “Hornswoggle?!?!” Kelly got on her knees to hug Hornswoggle. Springer said this was too crazy for him, and he left. As Springer walked out, Lawler got on the mic and stood on the middle rope. He said the group put on this charade to freak Springer out. He clarified by saying everything they said earlier wasn’t true. Ranjin Singh said that, like much of the audience, Khali feels this has been a waste of time. Lawler objected and said there is one intimate relationship they want to expose. And it’s a relationship….with Mae Young. She came out and did her thing to Springer. I’m not sure how to feel about that segment. I mean, the easy thing to say is how terrible it was, but I was laughing at the pure absurdity of it.
-They showed the parking lot again, awaiting Batista’ entrance.
-Also, John Cena faces Triple H in the main event this evening.
[Commercial Break]
(3) Kofi Kingston vs. Ted DiBiase
The announcers talked about DiBiase not being 100% after that kick from Sheamus earlier in the night. DiBiase aggressively went after Kofi in the corner, but Kofi exploded out and punched away at the head of DiBiase. High dropkick from Kingston, and DiBiase grabbed the ropes, evidently dazed based on the look on his face. Kofi kicked at the legs of DiBiase, then Kofi tripped him up. To the top he went, and came down with a chop to the head. More Kofi offense. He went for the Boom Drop and connected. Crowd wasn’t much into Kofi, aside from his signature spots. DiBiase struggled to get to his feet, and fell down before he could. Kingston charged but missed a splash as he crotched himself on the top rope. DiBiase pulled him down and landed Dream Street for the win.
Winner: DiBiase, at 2:57. First, Kingston backs into the Chamber match by winning via DQ, now he can’t beat a guy who clearly wasn’t 100%? I mean, Kingston got a lot of the offense, but jeez.
-The next entrant into the Class of 2010 WWE Hall-of-Fame: Antonio Inoki.
[Commercial Break]
-Lawler thanked Cypress Hill for providing the Elimination Chamber theme song. I didn’t know they were still around.
-Cole had the gall to call this “possibly the worst night in the history of Bret Hart.” They showed what happened earlier. We even got security cam footage of it from a different angle. Lawler said they haven’t gotten any further word on Bret’s condition.
-The Elimination Chamber matches were previewed via video package. Then they did the regular preview of the matches on the card.
-Hey, we finally got the Final Thought with Jerry Springer. He talked about the Elimination Chamber matches this Sunday. He said the Road To Wrestlemania gets a lot clearer this Sunday. “Take care of yourself, and each other.” Then he walked off the set with Mae Young, as apparently, he’s now smitten with her.
-John Cena was walking backstage. Apparently, since Batista hasn’t arrived, Cena is going to come out next.
[Commercial Break]
-John Cena entered the arena. They showed a video of Batista’s attack on Cena from two weeks ago. Cena said he doesn’t know Bret Hart’s condition, but everyone is pulling for him. He turned his attention to Dave Batista. He said Batista told everyone that he was coming to Raw to respond to his threats. Cena then called him out and told Batista to realize that he doesn’t make threats. Instead, he came on the TitanTron, live via satellite. Cena was less than excited. He said he’d get Batista to come out by turning his back, since that’s what happened last time. Batista said he’s doing Cena a huge favor by not showing up tonight. He said Cena does not want them to be in the same ring together. Batista said if they do lock horns again, Cena will wish it was a bad dream. Cena said those are the words of a tough guy, or, someone who acts like they’re tough. Batista just laughed and Cena said he’s no dentist, but he’ll take care of that smile for Batista. Dave said this was funny to him, because Cena keeps running his mouth when he’s not there. He said that next week, he will be at Raw, live, in the arena. He said we’ll see how mouthy Cena is then. He told Cena good luck on Sunday, as he’s pulling for him. Cena said he’s not afraid to get in the Chamber, unlike Batista. He finished by saying, “you want some, come get some!” Batista then got out of his seat and left. Triple H’s music hit (the actual Triple H music, not DX). The Game made his entrance for the main event. The match takes place next.
[Commercial Break]
-Next week’s guest hosts: Singer Jewel and her husband, bull-rider Ty Murray.
(4) John Cena vs. Triple H
Match started slowly with Cena applying a side-headlock. Shoulder tackle by Cena, but Triple H turned the tables and applied some shoulders to the gut of Cena in the corner. Fisherman suplex by Cena, but only a count of two could be attained. One-handed bulldog was avoided by Triple, who capitalized with a knee-drop. Cena came back and tried the STF, but The Game powered out. Cena threw Trips into the corner, sending Triple H over the buckle and to the outside. Cena tried to jump on Triple H, but he avoided it and Cena landed on the barricade. Trips tried a Pedigree, but Cena back-dropped out of it, still on the outside. They went to break at this point.
[Commercial Break]
Cena was working out of a rear chin-lock upon return. Shoulderblock to Triple H, and another. Five Knuckle Shuffle, but he couldn’t successfully land the Attitude Adjustment. Lawler again said there is no update on Bret Hart yet. At least they didn’t just forget about it. On the top rope, Trips tried to suplex Cena off, but Cena blocked it. Before he could hit a move off there, The Game crotched him. This time, Cena battled out again, but then connected on the legdrop across the back of Triple H’s neck. That got a two-count. STF was countered again by Triple H going to his back. They tussled and Trips caught Cena in a half-crab. Cena countered into a roll-up, but he turned that into an STF which was locked in. The ropes were within reach and he got to them to force a break. Cena measured him and picked him up for an Attitude Adjustment. Triple H grabbed the ropes and Cena let go. He went off the ropes and was met with a high knee. Spinebuster by Trips, then he set up for the Pedigree. The WWE Title flew into the ring, then soon after, Sheamus, who pump-kicked Triple H, causing a DQ.
Winner: Triple H, via DQ, at 11:51. Your basic Cena vs. Triple H match. No surprises here.
Cena got the better of Sheamus, but Sheamus came back with a pump kick for him after missing the first try. Crucifix Slam to Triple H. The show went off the air with a “you suck” chant for Sheamus and him standing tall in the ring.