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No Limit Marlins Commander's Achievements
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MEN (AND WOMEN).... I hope you gave your left nut some needed rest and relaxation the last couple of days, iced down that nut and got some good rest like a smart solider does in between skirmishes. We accomplished and succeeded in winning battle 1. The next more important battle is just in front of us as we push deeper into enemy territory. I call upon all of this No Limit Marlins Army..... GRAB THAT FUCKING LEFT NUT (OR OVARY), TIGHTER THAN BEFORE, GET YOUR BATTLE GEAR ON. GRAB THOSE LUCKY TSHIRTS, THOSE LUCKY JERSEYS, THAT LUCKY HAT. WHATEVER YOU FUCKING NEED, GET IT. ITS TIME FOR US TO STAND PROUD. STAND LOUD. WITHOUT OUR SUPPORT ON THE FRONT LINES, IT IS IMPOSSIBLE TO SUCCEED. GRAB ON, THAT TRAIN LEFT THE STATION LONG AGO FOR US ON THE FRONT LINES. INTO BATTLE WE GO....LOUD. PROUD. GRAB THAT FUCKING NUT (OR OVARY) AND GIVE OUT THAT PRIMAL ROAR. LET THEM KNOW FOR MILES WHO YOU ARE, WE ARE ON THE ENEMY'S FRONT STEP, SO LET THEM KNOW WE ARE THERE. LETS FUCKING PUSH INTO THIS BATTLE AND TOGETHER WE WILL EMERGE ON THE OTHER SIDE. VICTORIOUS.
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Congratulations Men (and Women). We have achieved success! Let that left nut (or ovary) rest up. Let's enjoy the fruit of our victories with a little bit of the good life for a bit. But be wary....we have only one a battle. The war is still staring us down in the face! But for now, exhale, ice down that left nut (or ovary)! Get a good rest, eat some good food, recharge! Let us remain at the ready for the next battle of this great War will be upon us soon, let us be ready to be on the front lines of this battle, ready to charge into enemy territory and take what is OURS! But first, we rest. At ease!
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(some moderator can fill in the game information) MAN YOUR FUCKING BATTLESTATIONS! ITS TIME TO PUSH THIS TEAM TOWARD VICTORY. ITS TIME FOR THE MARLINS NO LIMIT ARMY TO RISE UP AND BE READY FOR THIS GAME TODAY. LETS WIN AND LETS GIVE ZERO QUARTER. RAISE THOSE RED FLAGS OF NO MERCY TOWARD THE ENEMY AND LETS PUSH ONWARD TOWARD OUR GOALS FOR OCTOBER!
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BATTLE STATIONS
No Limit Marlins Commander replied to No Limit Marlins Commander's topic in Miami Marlins
why would you grab your right nut? Thats the one you need to produce heirs you fucking idiot. -
MARLIN FANS..... MAN YOUR BATTLE STATIONS. THE HOUR IS DAWNING AND IS UPON US!!!! THE PLAYOFFS ARE IN OUR SIGHTS AND ITS TIME TO PUT OUR PREPARATIONS INTO PRACTICE!!!! THE MARLINS NEED THEIR NO LIMIT ARMY NOW! CAN YOU SMELL THAT IN THE AIR? THATS FALL, THAT'S THE PLAYOFFS. GRAB THAT LEFT NUT (OR OVARY) AND LET ALL KNOW THAT YOU STAND BEHIND THIS FRANCHISE AS THEY BEGIN FULLY A QUEST FOR THE GREATEST GLORY POSSIBLE. THERE ARE NO EXCUSES FOR FAILURE. LET US NOT LET UP UNTIL THIS BATTLE IS OVER AND THE EVEN LARGER SKIRMISH AWAITS US. LET'S FULLY PREPARE OURSELVES FOR THE MAJOR AFFIAR WITH THIS WARM UP ACT. LET'S GO!!!!
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I call on my army of Marlins fans to be on standby. The hour is dawning where we will once more be called to stand up for this franchise, grab that left nut (or ovary) and be ready to go No Limit for this team in leading us to October victory. Be ready for the call from above will soon tell us to charge forward, to not cease and to not give quarter. This is the moment of final preparations, the train is leaving the station soon, as the No Limit Marlins army starts to charge into enemy territory ready to vanquish our enemies, leaving a wake of destruction along the way. Be ready, be vigliant. The hour approaches.
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Marlins NO LIMIT Army, Prepare! We have fought off the Little Cubs (again). As you are well aware, this job is far far from done. We know how to wage this war. We have won this war, we will continue to push forward. I implore, no no no I NEED you to squeeze hold that left nut (or ovary) until it truly hurts. Squeeze 10 seconds longer at that point. Primal roar. Primal scream. Make those fucking Braves hide in fear. It is time to conjure up times of this: May our pitching greats have strike zones like that as we summon the ghost of Eric Gregg. May our hitters find stirke zones that Gerry Davis may give us! May new heroes emerge. HOLD THAT FUCKING FLANK TIGHT!!!! I implore you to push forward though. There is no looking back. Fuck what is behind us. Fuck what is ahead of us. It is about the here and now. Show your fandom. Shake your cock or shake your tits, whatever brings you that good time feeling. In 3 short wins we will get those old school beers, pop them up and feel that sting. NO FUCKING BEER GOOGLES!!!! But let's not get ahead of ourselves. We find ourselves again facing the Atlanta 'not racially insensitive' Braves in this playoff round. Look, the mighty Braves are winners of these minor skirmishes. Good for them. Let them take their accolades. Let's look at this truth. Marlins NO LIMIT Army - 1. Atlanta ' Not racially insensitive' Braves - 0. What is that scoreboard. Playoffs. The only thing that fucking counts. Win your minor 162 game skirmishes. I prefer to win wars. I prefer to lead this mother fucking NO LIMIT army into battle and emerge with my flag flying higher than any other fan. Now.... the time is upon us AGAIN. Grab that left nut (or ovary). Squeeze real hard. Don't pop it though, you must be smart. I can't have you blowing your load quite yet. For you see this is only one battle in this war. While the inferior Marlin armies are posting stupid shit like this: Seriously, who gives a flying fuck what the San Diego fucking Padres are doing. The Marlins NO LIMIT army is busy pushing forward. Doing what we know how to do. Finding those good luck charms, that old ratty tshirt, that old hat thats weathered and dirty over time. Getting out those Marlin candles, those Marlin bobbleheads, whatever works for you do it. Shake those titties or those cocks like there is no tomorrow. I can only have victory. I can only focus on winning and vanquishing our opponent. Grab that mother fucking left nut (or ovary) squeeze it til it hurts. Playtime is over. The train is pushing down the track, gaining steam, gaining momentum, gaining speed. The time to hop on board is past. This is a runaway fucking Army. Let's go get this one boys (and girls). Victory will be ours. Let's get images of this again v these fucking Braves again.
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Marlin Fans, It is time. The time is upon us. Playoff season is upon us. Its time to grab that left nut (or ovary) and let out the most primal scream that you have ever let out. We have done this before. We will do it again. I have called upon troops to get ready for this time. I have called for preparation of this season. That time is upon us. We have been in this fight before. We have conquered the battlefield before. When we have been called upon to battle in the past we have risen victorious. This is the real NO LIMIT Marlins Army. I need you to be ready for battle. Grab that good luck charm, that old tattered shirt or jersey, that ratty old hat. Burn your Ivan Rodriguez candles again, put on the face of Miguel Rojas if you need to in order to burn that candle. Get your rosary beads if you do that, be ready. Its NO LIMIT time. Its time to grab that left nut (or ovary) hard. Its time to get your shit together. It's time to not look back. We are there now. We are ready to roll. The train left the station. I implore you to be passionate. I implore you to be primal. I implore you to not give a fuck about anyone less. I implore you to go NO LIMIT. We are the original fucking platoon of this fan base. Don't let these new imposters confuse you. While these lesser inferior armies are sending out shit like: The Marlins NO LIMIT Army are putting on that eye black, grabbing and squeezing that left nut (or ovary) and preparing for battle. This is no joke. We know how to make this happen and I implore you to fight hard, cheer harder and let all know where you stand. There is no looking back, only looking forward. The time is upon us soldiers. NO LIMIT is upon us. I need you at your best. I need you to get it all done. I need you to be passionate. I need you to fight. Its battle season and no battle season has ever been more open. Its time to slay some Cubs. Leave them behind in our wake and push forward NO LIMIT style. No quarter. No mercy. Fight. Push. Conquer. Nothing but victory is acceptable. Grab and squeeze that nut (or ovary) until it hurts, until you feel like its going to burst in your hands because who cares about the past. Its about today and the battle on our hands. Looking to tomorrow is a sucker's game. I need you TODAY. The NO LIMIT Army needs you TODAY. Let's go.
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MAN YOUR FUCKING BATTLESTATIONS! MAN YOUR FUCKING BATTLESTATIONS. The time is upon us men (and women). If you have been grabbing that left nut (or ovary) already as a true fan and as a part of this NO LIMIT Army of Marlin fans, I thank you for your loyalty and service. I need you to keep grabbing that left nut (or ovary), just a little harder now. You see, its do or die time. It's the time that will determine if we have a chance to take this battle field or if we will go down fighting like a champion! If you have not been all aboard, this is just about the last stop on this train to hop aboard and be a part of the NO LIMIT Marlins army. I need you to grab that fucking left nut (or ovary), let out that fucking primal growl, the one that comes from deep deep down inside your body and let all know who you stand for. Let people know you will not go down. Let people know you intend to be here at the end of the day, waving that flag high as you look out over the battlefield at the fallen armies laid in your haste. I need, and I implore you to get in and get on. The final battles approach us and we must be mindful of time as it is running short. Give it all you have, no holding back. For you see Battle is the most magnificent competition in which a human being can indulge. It brings out all that is best; it removes all that is base. All men are afraid in battle. The coward is the one who lets his fear overcome his sense of duty. Duty is the essence of manhood (and womanhood) and is the essence of being part of this Marlins NO LIMIT ARMY! Its NO LIMIT time. It's time to charge to our destiny!!!! How bout you!
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The Fight Continues
No Limit Marlins Commander replied to No Limit Marlins Commander's topic in Miami Marlins
The fact there are only 6 likes to my post is embarrassing and pathetic. The final battle will not go our way with maggots like so many of you around here refusing to go NO LIMIT in the pursuit of this war. Its time to nut up and show everyone what side of the tracks you are on. The train is leaving the station and you need to get your ass on the train and you need to get on it NOW. Damn maggots go hang with the swine if you refuse to stand behind and rise up for battle. -
Gentlemen (and Ladies), The battle has not stopped, the field is not cleared yet and our flag is not the one flying high (yet). I implore all of you to saddle up and be prepared for this long and courageous fight. We must continue to go No Limit, your support on this quest for the playoffs is needed and appreciated. Look at what going No Limit has done, our spot in the tournament looks secure, but by no means is it safe! We must continue to pursue the enemy, cheer on this young, scrappy, hungry team and push them into the playoffs! In times like these, we have to look at what we know. What we know is that deep down we have the knowledge of finishing a war is like. Let's rekindle those emotions, grab that left nut (or ovary) as each skirmish wages on and don't let up. As we deeper into the trenches, it will be time to squeeze a little harder, let out a deeper primal roar. Find that good luck charm. Wear that old hat, that ratty tshirt, that special bobblehead, those rosary beads, whatever it is, use it. They still exist. They have worked before. They will work again. The Fight is only beginning gentlemen (and ladies). I cannot have you back off as of yet. I cannot have you let off the gas. I need you to push harder. Make this team feel like fans are in the ballpark from afar. Watch those games, break the ratings machines. It's time to show the world what this No Limit Army is capable of once again. We have been dormant for far too long. It is time to rectify that situation. Saddle up. Nut up. Grab that left nut (or ovary) and let's keep on fighting this fight. Let's see if we can taste that sweet taste of victory yet again, smell that sweet smell of the battlefield after you are victorious. Are you with me?
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No. This is battle where we are the aggressor.. This is saddling up and heading into town looking for that pennant. Not a defense of anything, instead we are the aggressor. We are coming into town and taking what we seek. We are ripping the hopes and dreams from the armies we conquer along the way until we are left on the battlefield, waving our flag proudly over our vanquished opponents.
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Sounds like you have an issue following direction. You will just have to grab that left nut and hope for the best son. Times like these call for our soldiers to be unified in battle. Cannot have any that do not follow direction as that will lead us down a path of failure. Grab that left nut son and give it a big ole squeeze.