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Darwin Awards 2003


Aug 19, 2002
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Hard to believe, but another year has passed and we once again have the
Darwin Award nominees. The Darwin is awarded every year to the person who
died (or almost died) in the stupidest way.

This year's nominees are:

Nominee No. 1:

[San Jose Mercury News]: An unidentified man, using a shotgun like a
club to break a former girlfriend's windshield, accidentally shot himself
to death when the gun discharged, blowing a hole in his gut.

>> > Nominee No. 2:
[Kalamazoo Gazette]: James Burns, 34, (a mechanic) of Alamo, Mich., was
killed as he was trying to repair what police describe as a "farm type
truck." Burns got a friend to drive the truck on a highway while Burns
hung underneath so that he could ascertain the source of a troubling
noise. Burns' clothes caught on something, however, and the other man
found Burns "wrapped in the drive shaft."

>> > Nominee No. 3:

[Hickory Daily Record]: Ken Charles Barger, 47, accidentally shot himself
to death in Newton, NC Awakening to the sound of a ringing telephone
beside his bed, he reached for the phone but grabbed a Smith & Wesson 38
Special, which discharged when he put it to his ear.

>> > Nominee No. 4:
[UPI, Toronto]: Police said a lawyer demonstrating the safety of windows
in a downtown Toronto skyscraper crashed through a pane with his shoulder
and plunged 24 floors to his death. A police spokesman said Garry Hoy,39,
fell into the courtyard of the Toronto Dominion Bank Tower early Friday
evening as he was demonstrating the strength of the building's windows to
visiting law students. Peter Lawson, managing partner of the firm Holden
Day Wilson, told the Toronto Sun newspaper that Hoy was "one of the
best and brightest" members of the 200-man association.

>> > Nominee No. 5:
[Bloomberg News Service]: A terrible diet and a room with no
ventilation are being blamed for the death of a man who was killed by his
own gas.An autopsy showed large amounts of methane gas in his system. His
diet had consisted primarily of beans and cabbage. It was just the right
combination of foods, and the man died in his sleep from breathing the
poisonous cloud hanging over his bed. According to the article, "He was a
big man with a huge capacity for creating this deadly gas." Three of the
rescuers got sick and one was hospitalized.

>> > Nominee No. 6:
[The News of the Weird]: Michael Anderson Godwin made News of the Weird
posthumously. He had spent several years awaiting South Carolina's
electric chair on a murder conviction, but his sentence had just been
reduced to life in prison. While sitting on a metal toilet in his cell
attempting to fix his small TV set, he bit into a wire and was electrocuted.

>> > Nominee No. 7:
[The Indianapolis Star]: A cigarette lighter may have triggered a fatal
explosion in Dunkirk, Indiana. A Jay County man using a cigarette lighter
to check the barrel of a muzzle loader was killed Monday night when the
weapon discharged in his face. Gregory David Pryor, 19, died in his
parents' home about 11:30 PM. Investigators said Pryor was cleaning a
54-caliber muzzle loader that had not been firing properly. He was using
the lighter to look into the barrel when the gun powder ignited.

>> > Nominee No. 8:
[Reuters, Mississauga, Ontario]: A man cleaning a bird feeder on the
balcony of his condominium apartment slipped and fell 23 stories to his
death. Stefan Macko, 55, was standing on a wheeled chair when the
accident occurred, said Inspector D'Arcy Honer of the Peel Regional
Police. "It appears the chair moved and he went over the balcony."

>> > Finally, Nominee No. 9, The Winner!!!:
[Arkansas Democrat Gazette]: Two local men were injured when their pickup
truck left the road and struck a tree on State Highway 38 early
Monday. Woodruff County deputy Dovey Snyder reported the accident shortly
after midnight Monday.
Thurston Poole, 33, of Des Arc and Billy Ray Wallis, 38, of Little Rock
were returning to Des Arc after a frog gigging trip. When the headlights
malfunctioned, the two men concluded that the headlight fuse on the older
model truck had burned out. A replacement fuse was not available, but
Wallis noticed that the .22 caliber bullet from his pistol fit perfectly
into the fuse box. Upon inserting the bullet the headlights again began
to operate properly and the two men proceeded on eastbound toward the
White River Bridge.
After traveling approximately twenty miles the bullet apparently
overheated, discharged, and struck Poole in the right testicle. The
vehicle swerved sharply right, exited the pavement and struck a tree.
Poole suffered only minor cuts and abrasions from the accident, but will
require surgery to repair the testicle. Wallis sustained a broken clavicle
and was treated and released. Upon being notified of the wreck,
Poole's wife asked how many frogs the boys had caught, and did anyone get
them from the truck?



Aug 19, 2002
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:lol :lol :lol :lol :lol :lol :p :p :p ROFLMAO!!!!!!!! :lol :lol :D :D

Damn Death's not funny but... God how in the hell do you die like that. How does your obit look? :lol :lol

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