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Mike Lowell is one funny guy....

Ramp

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credit:Jayson Stark of espn.com
It's one of those feats that never did get all the attention and acclaim it so rightfully deserved. Two thousand and 41 at-bats. No triples?

Well that noted triple threat from the Florida Marlins, Mike Lowell, had done just that over six distinguished, trifecta-free seasons. And then it happened.

April 17. First inning. Marlins vs. Phillies. Mike Lowell pounded one into the right-field corner. Phillies right fielder Bobby Abreu "took 45 minutes to get to it," as best Lowell recalls.

And there it was, friends. The historic moment you had all forgotten to be waiting for: Mike Lowell's very first career triple. Never even had to slide.

"That's my proudest part of it all," Lowell told Wild Pitches. "Standup."

Triples just don't get more electrifying than this. Not to mention historic. Yet ...

The Hall of Fame never called. ("They haven't been beating my door down lately," Lowell reported.) The president never called. Even Lowell's local congressman never called.

"No one," Lowell said, clearly wounded. "I'm feeling kind of short-changed."

Or at least he was until Wild Pitches called.

"Thanks," Lowell told us. "You're the highlight of my day so far."

Well, Lowell should feel short-changed. And more than a kind of. You think it's easy going 2,041 at-bats without a triple? Consider this:

# Back in the good old 1890s, a guy named Tom Poorman had 2,043 major-league at-bats -- and hit 43 triples. The president never called him, either, by the way -- possibly because the telephone hadn't been invented yet.

# Lowell debuted in the big leagues on Sept. 13, 1998. Since then, Twins shortstop Cristian Guzman has swatted 46 triples.

# At the time Lowell reached the major leagues, the all-time record for most at-bats in a triple-free career was only 1,303, by catching leadfoot Mark Parent. So Lowell proceeded to blow past that record by 700 at-bats.

"I figured I'd be like Cal Ripken, after he broke Gehrig's record," Lowell quipped. "Just annihilate it."

And so he did. Until he made the mistake of un-annihilating it. That's the only problem with records like this one -- most career at-bats without something or other. Once you achieve the something or other, you forfeit your record.

"Well," Lowell said, "they say records are made to be broken -- or unbroken."

But apparently, the sadness of unbreaking his record was obliterated by the exhilaration of finally reaching third base.

"I was about to pull the base out," Lowell laughed. "But I asked Derrek Lee, `Would that be wrong?' He said, `That would be pretty stupid.' So I left it in."

There was something fitting, too, about the fact that Lowell finally thumped this triple on a day when the wind-chill factor was in the 20s. You know that old saying about how the best way to stay warm is to keep moving?

"Yeah, I took that to heart," Lowell said.

But as with every great feat, there's a little emptiness that accompanies it -- once the man who climbed the mountain realizes that's one less mountain left to climb. So the question on all our minds now is: What does Mike Lowell have left to accomplish? An inside-the-park homer?

"Nah," Lowell decided. "For that to happen, I'd need both outfielders to collide and get carted off. And when the stretcher comes out, I figured I'd just be rounding third. And it would still be bang-bang."

So Lowell figures he'll just start piling on a bunch more triples, now that he's got the hang of it.

"You know what they say," Lowell philosophized. "You steal one base, you're a base-stealer. The way I look at it, I'm obviously getting faster as the years go by. So I'm running through all the signs now."

Might as well. He has lost his status as a big-time Zero Hero, so there's nothing to hold him back. So we'll just turn our attention to the new all-time record holder -- current A's catcher Ramon Hernandez (1,481 at-bats, zero triples, through Sunday).

"He's what -- about 500 (at-bats) back?" Lowell mused. "Maybe this time next year, I'll fly into Oakland when he gets to 2,000 -- and we can have a little ceremony."
 

Shamrock

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Mark Redman is also a joker. In an edition of an Arizona paper they had Mike Redmond's picture as the starting pitcher for the Marlins not Mark Redman. After the game Redman joked, "Maybe he got the win, but hopefully I got the triple" referring to the pinch-hit triple my Mike Redmond in the 8th.

lol :plain
 

Wild Card

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"I was about to pull the base out," Lowell laughed. "But I asked Derrek Lee, `Would that be wrong?' He said, `That would be pretty stupid.' So I left it in."



An inside-the-park homer?

"Nah," Lowell decided. "For that to happen, I'd need both outfielders to collide and get carted off. And when the stretcher comes out, I figured I'd just be rounding third. And it would still be bang-bang."
These two parts had me laughing for five mintues... almost...
 

AJBurnett34

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LoL, He is one funny guy. I cant believe he hadnt had a triple in so many At-Bats. Thats one slow runner. He should of had at least a couple of truiples with all those Double's he has last year....
 

marlin2266

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Even lead-foot Charles Johnsion has had 4 triples in his career (most recently in 1997).
 
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is he really that slow, I think he has be given 2 steal signs this season. I think he has been safe at least one of those times
 

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