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Random Thoughts


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Number 10 - Life is sexually transmitted.



Number 9 - Good health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one

can die.



Number 8 - Men have two emotions: Hungry and Horny. If you see him

without an erection, make him a sandwich!



Number 7 - Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day; teach a

person to use the Internet and they won't bother you for weeks.



Number 6 - Some people are like a Slinky.....not really good for

anything, but you still can't help but smile when you see one tumble

down the stairs.



Number 5 - Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in

hospitals dying of nothing.



Number 4 - All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no

attention to criticism.



Number 3 - Why does a slight tax increase cost you two hundred dollars

and a substantial tax cut saves you thirty cents?



Number 2 - In the 60's, people took acid to make the world weird. Now

the world is weird and people take Prozac to make it normal.





We know exactly where one cow with mad-cow-disease is located among the

millions and millions of cows in America but we haven't got a clue as

to where thousands of illegal immigrants and terrorists are located.

Maybe we should put the Department of Agriculture in charge of


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