Post some funny Instant Message convos...

 

A couple rules to keep things funny and easy:

 

Try to limit the amount of lines... if we have to read a novel to get the joke at the end... well, nobody's probably gonna read that much

 

Try to avoid "inside-jokes"

bobbob1313 (10:39:54 PM): Dude, just move to Broward. We can be bffs and stuff.

ShadezNation26 (10:39:59 PM): we could

ShadezNation26 (10:40:01 PM): it'd be great

bobbob1313 (10:40:14 PM): We could be like that one guy and that other guy.

ShadezNation26 (10:40:17 PM): we could listen to music and watch marlins games and make a montage

bobbob1313 (10:41:05 PM): It'll be so fun.

 

ShadezNation26 (2:06:15 AM): hey, why's my future wife endorsing mccain satirically

Rabb (2:06:28 AM): lol

ShadezNation26 (2:07:38 AM): man... she's cute even when she's cussin' up a storm

Rabb (2:07:56 AM): Hell, her cursing made it even better, IMO

Rabb (2:08:42 AM): Maybe it's because women use such language in bed

Rabb (2:08:44 AM): you know

Rabb (2:08:47 AM): get the **** off me

Rabb (2:08:51 AM): i'm calling the ****ing cops

Rabb (2:08:54 AM): **** like that

 

ShadezNation26 (5:03:53 PM): I have a bit of a present for Elecia

KC (5:04:10 PM): Oh truly? =D What is it? She isnt looking.

ShadezNation26 (5:04:14 PM): Dominoes

KC (5:04:18 PM): Oh ****.

ShadezNation26 (5:04:20 PM): just like a ton of dominoes

KC (5:04:23 PM): She's gonna freak.

ShadezNation26 (5:04:42 PM): irrational fear of dominoes?

KC (5:04:43 PM): I have no clue why, but she gets unstably excited when presented with mundane gifts.

KC (5:05:04 PM): A deck of cards, a yoyo, and dominoes would produce the same effect as you or me getting a sports car

 

grouchomarx735 (1:03:34 AM): dude, I was playing baseball last night too

Russ (1:03:37 AM): and tonight...

Russ (1:03:39 AM): I love games.

ShadezNation26 (1:03:43 AM): hahaha

ShadezNation26 (1:03:47 AM): baseball where?

Russ (1:03:53 AM): oh you know.. places

Russ (1:03:54 AM): >_>

ShadezNation26 (1:03:58 AM): ummm

ShadezNation26 (1:04:01 AM): trunk of a car?

ShadezNation26 (1:04:03 AM): >_>

Russ (1:04:07 AM): .......

Russ (1:04:11 AM): how would 2 people even-

Russ (1:04:13 AM): no.

Russ (1:04:21 AM): not the trunk of a car.

ShadezNation26 (1:04:37 AM): DUDE, you're not thinking creative enough

ShadezNation26 (1:04:39 AM): but go on

Russ (1:04:43 AM): ..

Russ (1:04:51 AM): what the fu-

Russ (1:04:54 AM): ok

Matt (5:13:19 PM): NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Matt (5:13:22 PM): PHELPS SUCKS FACE WITH AUSSIE- New York Post

ShadezNation26 (5:14:29 PM): why nooooooooooooo

Matt (5:14:55 PM): Stephanie Rice is off the market?!

ShadezNation26 (5:15:07 PM): you never had a chance

ShadezNation26 (5:15:09 PM): never

ShadezNation26 (5:15:11 PM): never ever

ShadezNation26 (5:15:17 PM): in a million years

Matt(5:15:23 PM): :-(

ShadezNation26 (5:15:42 PM): you're a f***Ing commie for rooting against michael phelps though

ShadezNation26 (5:15:53 PM): he gets gold medal ***** too

 

< Alkivar> we're on our way back from partying in NYC over the weekend ... it was like sunday afternoon we're headed back west

< Alkivar> we're cruisin... maybe 130-140mph

< Alkivar> flew past a trooper on the side of the road

< Alkivar> trooper lights up ... siren blasting ... chasing us down the highway

< Alkivar> we're both like should we stop ... there's no way he can catch up to us

< Alkivar> we decided to be good and stop

< Alkivar> cop catches up to us ... comes out gun drawn ... pissed as hell

< Alkivar> walks up to the side of the car and goes

< Alkivar> "SON CAN I SEE YOUR PILOT'S LICENSE"

< Alkivar> Jason pulls out his f***ing pilot's license

< Alkivar> cop's jaw hits the f***ing ground

< Alkivar> most stunned face I've ever f***ing seen

< Alkivar> in this practically a whimper goes "get the f*** out of here"

< Alkivar> no ticket... too embarassed apparently

< Alkivar> I'll never forget that day long as I live

< Alkivar> I was sure we were goin to jail

 

HEY EURAKARTE

INSULT

RETORT

COUNTER-RETORT

QUESTIONING OF SEXUAL PREFERENCE

SUGGESTION TO SHUT THE f*** UP

NOTATION THAT YOU CREATE A VACUUM

RIPOSTE

ADDON RIPOSTE

COUNTER-RIPOSTE

COUNTER-COUNTER RIPOSTE

NONSENSICAL STATEMENT INVOLVING PLANKTON

RESPONSE TO RANDOM STATEMENT AND THREAT TO BAN OPPOSING SIDES

WORDS OF PRAISE FOR FISHFOOD

ACKNOWLEDGEMENT AND ACCEPTENCE OF TERMS

That cussing joke is one of the best I've ever made.

That cussing joke is one of the best I've ever made.

Really..... I wasn't laughing...

That cussing joke is one of the best I've ever made.

Really..... I wasn't laughing...

Well, that's because you have no sense of humor, obviously.

That cussing joke is one of the best I've ever made.

Really..... I wasn't laughing...

In response:

 

Rab: That's because you have no sense of humor

AdrianneLove: lol

AdrianneLove: But you love me nonetheless lol

Rab: Yes

AdrianneLove: Because if you didn't... I WILL KILL YOU!

Rab: Well, that's to be expected.

AdrianneLove: Good.

AdrianneLove: Don't drink the water....

wait these are real or can they be made up

and is there a way to look up previous IM's

wait these are real or can they be made up

and is there a way to look up previous IM's

 

All mine are real... they're intended to be real, that's the fun