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Killer Biscuits Wanted for Attempted Murder

(actual AP headline)

 

Lisa Burnett, 23, a resident of San Diego, was visiting her in-laws, and while there went to a nearby supermarket to pick up some groceries. Several people noticed her sitting in her car with the windows rolled up and with her eyes closed, with both hands behind the back of her head. One customer who had been at the store for a while became concerned and walked over to teh car. He noticed that Lisa's eyes were now open, and she looked very strange. He asked her if she was okay, and Lisa replied that she'd been shot in the back of the head, and had been holding her brains in for over an hour. The man called the paramedics, who broke into the car because the doors ere locked and Lisa refused to remover her hands from her head. When they finally got in, they found that Lisa had a wad of bread dough on the back of her head...A Pillsbury biscuit canister had exploded from the heat, making loud noise that sounded like a gunshot, and the wad of dough hit her in the back of ther head. When she reached back to find out what it was, she felt the dough and thought it was her brains. She initially passed out, but quickly recovered and tried to hold her brains in for over an hour until someone noticed and cam to her aid. Lisa is blonde.

 

 

 

 

 

classic

this is a REAL headline.

Thank the Lord for stupid people.

That is quite possibly be the funniest thing I've ever heard...

LoL you would think she'd notice that there's no blood.

LoL you would think she'd notice that there's no blood.

well...cmon cut her some slack...She's blonde after all

 

 

j/k :p ;)

i doubt thats true.

 

that had to be made up somehow

 

but why was she holding the dough behind her head? thats thats the question

i doubt thats true.

 

that had to be made up somehow

 

but why was she holding the dough behind her head? thats thats the question

cuz shes stupid

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