Madonna's adopted baby's father tells how he was powerless to stop her

 

By Angella Johnson Last updated at 10:59am on 15th October 2006

 

 

The father of the little boy adopted by Madonna in Malawi has described his feelings of confusion and powerlessness in the face of the singer's determination to take his only surviving child away.

 

Peasant farmer Yohane Banda, who can barely read or write, admitted he didn't fully understand what was happening when he went to court on Thursday in his best clothes to see for the first and only time the woman who was offering his 13-month-old son David a new life in the West.

 

All he knew, as he sat in his dirt-stained cotton trousers, a check shirt and his treasured black denim jacket at the High Court in Lilongwe, the capital of Malawi, was that the slight, blonde woman standing before him in a simple black dress and black knee-high boots was hoping to take his boy away.

 

Yohane's court ordeal will further intensify criticism that Madonna had flown into the poor African country and used her wealth and celebrity status to try to steamroller authorities into granting a fast-track adoption.

 

For despite the court issuing an interim custody order, it seems Madonna is yet to start the complicated legal proceedings necessary in Britain to adopt a child.

 

If she does not complete the procedures, she could face a jail sentence of 12 months.

 

In Malawi, where the law prohibits adoptions by non-residents, human rights groups have stepped up their campaign to prevent David being taken away.

 

The charity Malawi's Eye Of The Child will tomorrow seek an injunction opposing the adoption.

 

Meanwhile Yohane, 31, whose wife Marita, 28, died a week after their son was born, was left to reflect on the confusing events of his day in court with Madonna.

 

Speaking exclusively to The Mail on Sunday, he said: "She was smiling a lot. She told me, 'Your son is very beautiful and he makes me very happy. I promise to take very good care of him.'

 

"I looked directly into her eyes and said, 'Although I am giving you my son I want you to look after him well as he is the only one I possess. I want you to keep this boy, raise him, educate him - but you have to know he is my son and he is a Malawian.'

 

"Then she thanked me for surrendering my child into her care. She said: 'I could not have taken him if you had not wholeheartedly consented.'"

 

The 30-minute court hearing was conducted in English, with Yohane taking part through a translator.

 

"I sat directly opposite Madonna and we looked at each other face to face throughout the meeting," Yohane said.

 

"I was looking into her eyes and I could tell from them that she was a good lady."

 

He confessed he had been nervous and overawed by his surroundings, and bewildered by the speed at which his baby had been put up for adoption.

 

"It has all been very crazy. Everything has happened so fast. I can't believe what is happening."

 

But he added: "In court I did understand that I was agreeing to give the baby up for adoption."

 

Yohane, who left school at 12, said he had not been able to understand the nine-page document written in English which was presented to him in his village home by Reverend Thompson Chipeta, a retired preacher who runs the Home Of Hope Orphan Care Centre in Mchinji, a town near Malawi's Zambian border, where David lived.

 

Yohane told how David had been in the orphanage since his mother died. The intention was that he would one day return to live at home.

 

But it appears David was offered for adoption without his father's knowledge when his picture was sent, along with those of 12 other "suitable", boy babies, by e-mail to Madonna.

 

Yohane said the first he knew about the adoption was on September 30, when two officials from Malawi's Ministry of Gender and Child Welfare came to the village.

 

He said: "They told me a mzungu (white foreigner) had seen a picture of David and liked him very much.

 

"They said she wanted to adopt and take him to America. They said that she would give him a better life.

 

"At first I wasn't very sure. I asked if it meant that I would never see him again.

 

"They said I would be sent pictures and when David was older he would be able to visit the village."

 

"My family and I agreed that this was a very good opportunity for David to get an education and grow up healthy.

 

"There were some minor disagreements about his Malawian culture but we said yes."

 

Yohane had never heard of Madonna, or her raunchy songs. He was told only that she was "a very nice Christian lady".

 

It was never explained that Madonna is in fact deeply involved with the Kabbalah sect.

 

But it is clear that once she arrived in Malawi on October 4, when she hoped to collect David, Yohane felt swept up in what by then appeared to be a relentless process.

 

He said: "I had taken David to the orphanage because my wife had died and he was sick and we could not care for him. My other two sons had passed away from malaria while they were still young - one was almost three and one just over a year old. When David became very sick I didn't know how to cope.

 

"I am a single man with no experience of these things. My in-laws, who live in Zambia, did not want him and my extended family is too poor to take him in.

 

"I was scared he would die like my other children so I took him where he could be looked after properly. I felt very sore in my heart, but I could think of no other way.

 

"He was one month and seven days old. The orphanage made me sign a letter to show that I was handing him over to their charge, but I suppose deep in my heart I always imagined that when he was better, or I had got another wife, I would go and take him back. I did not think anyone would want to take him away.

 

"But I was persuaded by Rev Chipeta. He said that I was to hold fast and not waver in my decision.

 

"He said many people would come to the village and tell me things but that I should go ahead and let the woman have my son - that it was the best thing for David's future."

 

Even if Yohane had been able to read the documents relating to the proposed adoption, it is possible he would not have understood their legal implications.

 

A simple man, he spends his days tending a tiny vegetable garden, caring for a handful of scrawny goats and growing maize, which he sells in local markets.

 

To make extra money he carves wooden handles for hoses, axes and other tools used by subsistence farmers like himself. Around him run ragged children. Everyone here is poor beyond the imagination of most Westerners.

 

Yohane's 56-year-old mother, Athnet Mwale, explained: "No-one here could take care of David. He needed good milk and nutrition. We are too poor even to properly feed ourselves.

 

"When we sent him away it wasn't because we did not want him. It was because we could not look after him."

 

Now Yohande's younger brother Jeffrey and other family members have written a letter to the orphanage protesting that David could be taken out of the country by a "rich white donor".

 

It pleads that the baby must be brought up "knowing his Malawian culture".

 

It all leaves David the innocent victim of a legal stalemate. With Madonna unable to bring the baby home without the appropriate paperwork and the Malawian authorities unable to let him leave, he remains at the luxury Kumbali Lodge, where Madonna and her husband Guy Ritchie stayed during their visit.

 

There is believed to be a wet nurse, a driver and a male bodyguard all in attendance and according to sources, a leading child psychologist flew into the country with Madonna and is still there with the child.

 

Meanwhile Yohane still struggles to come to terms with what he has done. He says he has received no money in connection with the adoption of his child, but there is a sense that this committed Christian, who sang with his late wife in the local church choir, has a niggling suspicion that what has happened is not right.

 

Certainly he has never behaved like a man who willingly abandoned his son.

 

For the past nine months he has visited his son whenever he could - regularly cycling the 25 miles from his home in the village to the orphanage along treacherous dirt and stone tracks more suited to rugged four wheel drive vehicles.

 

He said: "I would bring him food from my garden, then sit and play with him for a while. I wanted him to know that I was his father, that I love him very much.

 

"He is my only child still living and I think of him as a gift from God. He is also the best memory I have left of my wife."

 

David was one of around 100 babies being cared for at the Home of Hope. But it was he who Madonna selected to share her opulent lifestyle, taking only slightly longer to make her choice, according to one acerbic critic, "than she would to select a new handbag".

 

Sources at the orphanage told The Mail on Sunday that almost immediately after landing in Malawi, Madonna had rushed to see the child.

 

One said: "The first thing she did was move David and his nanny into a private room. She said she had been excited during her flight at the prospect of seeing him for the first time.

 

"She was so wrapped up in her baby. She said he had lovely hair and cooed over his dark skin. Guy was there, but he said nothing and kept in the background. He didn't hold the baby.

 

"Madonna carried David out in her arms and seemed very happy. Her smile was very big she said, 'Oh he's beautiful I just adore him'. I didn't see her husband hold him at all."

 

Staff at the luxury lodge reported that Madonna and her husband had slept in separate beds and would put the baby's cot between them at night during their stay.

 

Guy held the baby only occasionally, but Madonna was seen walking with him strapped to her back in a fabric sling, Malawian style.

 

Two days after Madonna arrived, Yohane received a message from the orphanage.

 

He said: "They wanted to know if I was still happy to go ahead as the lady donor who wanted David had come to take him.

 

"I said yes. The person said I should not leave the village as I needed to sign some papers."

 

The Rev Chipeta met Yohane on October 7 to explain what would happen next.

 

Yohane said: "He said I would have to go into Lilongwe and fill in some papers. I still didn't know the name of the woman.

 

"He just said she was a good Christian lady, who does a lot of charity work and also supported the orphanage.

 

"I asked if David could come to the village, one last time, so we could say goodbye.

 

"Rev Chipeta brought him the next day. It was Sunday and he was with his nanny.

 

"We killed a goat and had a small ceremony. There were tears and also happiness, because we feel he will come back to us one day."

 

It was only last Monday, after this newspaper was the first to track down Yohane at his remote village, that he learned the identity of his child's benefactor. He had never heard of her.

 

Perhaps it is not surprising. Lipunga, the village where he lives has no electricity or lavatories and baths are pits dug on the outskirts of the settlement.

 

Children, clad in rags, are covered in the red dirt that blows over the mountain range from Zambia, their faces smothered with the remains of dried food.

 

There are no obvious signs of hunger, but nor is there any indication that anyone here owns anything of any value.

 

Yohane said he wanted his son raised with Christian values. And he had been repeatedly reassured that everything was being done in David's best interests.

 

"I suppose that I don't have any say in what happens to him now," he said.

 

"But Madonna's lawyer told me at the court David would be brought at regular intervals for visits to Malawi.

 

"So I am sure I will see him. Maybe she will bring him to the village.

 

"He will always be in my heart. I hate to see him leave Malawi but I have come to accept the loss.

 

"The government people told me it would be a good thing for the country. He will come back educated and able to help us, that will be a good thing."

 

 

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/pages/live/arti...in_page_id=1770

 

Nice.

There has to be more to this.

 

 

Madonna has better things to do than going around stealing children.

My husband and I began the adoption process many months prior to our trip to Malawi.

I did not wish to disclose my intentions to the world prior to the adoption happening as this is a private family matter.

After learning that there were over one million orphans in Malawi, it was my wish to open up our home and help one child escape an extreme life of hardship, poverty and in many cases death, as well as expand our family.

Nevertheless, we have gone about the adoption procedure according to the law like anyone else who adopts a child. Reports to the contrary are totally inaccurate.

The procedure includes an 18-month evaluation period after which time we hope to make this adoption permanent.

This was not a decision or commitment that my family or I take lightly.

I am overwhelmed and inspired by my trip to Malawi and hope that it helps bring attention to how much more the world needs to do to help the children of Africa.

My heartfelt thanks for all the good wishes I have received and I hope the press will allow my family some room for us to experience the joy we feel to have David home.

 

Madonna Ritchie

October 17, 2006

London, England

 

http://news.sky.com/skynews/article/0,,30000-1237640,00.html

 

 

 

Dad in Madonna adoption blasts critics

 

By RAPHAEL TENTHANI, Associated Press WriterWed Oct 18, 12:42 PM ET

 

The biological father of Baby David - the 13-month-old boy adopted by Madonna — on Wednesday criticized human rights groups seeking to reverse the move and said his child should stay with the star.

 

The Human Rights Consultative Committee, a coalition of 67 organizations, launched a legal challenge Tuesday to the Malawian government decision to relax the usual ban on adoptions by foreigners and relax the requirement that prospective parents have to stay with the child for 18-24 months for assessment before the adoption is formalized.

 

"Where were these people when David was struggling in the orphanage? These so-called human rights groups should leave my baby alone," Yohane Banda said.

 

"As father I have okayed this, I have no problem; the village has no problem, who are they to cause trouble? Please let them stop."

 

Madonna and British film director husband Guy Ritchie Thursday spent eight days in Malawi and last Thursday signed adoption papers for Baby David. Banda, David's father, counter-signed the papers and High Court judge, Justice Andrew Nyirenda, issued the celebrity couple an 'interim order' okaying the couple to take the baby away "with conditions."

 

The boy was flown to London on Monday.

 

A government official said the laws being used by the civil rights groups to mount the challenge were "archaic."

 

Penston Kilembe, the Director of Child Welfare Services in the Ministry of Gender, child Welfare and Community Services, told The AP the laws the civil rights groups are using are "archaic."

 

"These laws date back to the 1940s; things have changed now," he said. "Madonna and her husband has broken no laws as far as government is concerned. They have followed all the legal steps."

 

Kilembe said when approving the adoption of Baby David government looked at rights of the baby and the family and "found nothing amiss."

 

"These groups should fight for rights of children, not block the same like they are trying to do now," he said.

 

The civil rights groups chairman, Justice Dzonzi, said they were not against the adoption, but wanted the laws followed. "If Madonna really wants the child, she has to apply for residency permit in Malawi," he said.

 

The star found David at the Home of Hope Orphanage, which looks after more than 500 children who have lost one or both parents.

 

Banda's wife, Marita, 28, died a week after giving birth to David. The couple, who had been married for over 10 years, had two other sons who died in infancy from malaria.

 

"I was alone with a baby; I had no money, I couldn't buy him milk, that's why I surrendered him to the orphanage," said Banda.

 

"Orphanage life is no good. We leave kids there because we can't look after them properly ourselves. Now my son has been taken by a kindhearted woman, these people want to bring him back to the orphanage," lamented Banda, standing in his small garden of onions and tomatoes.

 

The peasant farmer said Madonna and Ritchie promised him nothing apart from "love and care for my David."

 

Banda's village is typical of many in Malawi — no electricity or running water, and basic mud huts. Few inhabitants had even heard of Madonna before the controversy erupted.

 

"Whoever she is she is a kindhearted woman," said Village Headman Lipunga, the chief of the village. "We all love her here and we hope she will visit us soon."

 

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20061018/ap_en_...wN5bnN1YmNhdA--

i'm no madonna fan and question her intentions, however the father seemed like he understood what was going on, even if the process was a bit overwhelming

 

the article tries to have a bad slant and the title is horrible, but he seems to be sad at giving up his kid and having his wife and other kids die - confused by the commotion and legal process - but happy that his kid can have a healthy life and possibilities at education - and finally hopeful that his son will stay true to their cultures, visit the village and one day help them out using his new education

 

hopefully madonna realizes the responsibility she has to the father and the village to educate the kid on his roots

i'm no madonna fan and question her intentions, however the father seemed like he understood what was going on, even if the process was a bit overwhelming

 

the article tries to have a bad slant and the title is horrible, but he seems to be sad at giving up his kid and having his wife and other kids die - confused by the commotion and legal process - but happy that his kid can have a healthy life and possibilities at education - and finally hopeful that his son will stay true to their cultures, visit the village and one day help them out using his new education

 

hopefully madonna realizes the responsibility she has to the father and the village to educate the kid on his roots

 

 

I hope and pray for the kid. Hopefully he doesn't end up being as screwed up as she is. Seems like adopting kids is the new trend in Hollywood, like Kabala and Scientology.

 

I can just picture Madonna in her fake British accent choosing which baby she wanted.

Funny how even when Madonna does a good thing, she gets criticized. Would you rather have a child live in poverty and possibly die of disease than him having his life saved and having a good education?

 

If it is a "trend" to adopt babies, then gee, that's not a bad trend at all. I'd like to take part in it someday too.

Funny how even when Madonna does a good thing, she gets criticized. Would you rather have a child live in poverty and possibly die of disease than him having his life saved and having a good education?

 

If it is a "trend" to adopt babies, then gee, that's not a bad trend at all. I'd like to take part in it someday too.

 

 

I don't have a problem with people adopting babies. It's how she went about doing it that I find disgusting. Don't you find it disgusting that she sat around for awhile and picked the baby like some dog at a pet store? I do and apparently so do many.

 

I think your fandom is getting in the way of making a reasonable judgement.

Is that how it is Malawi? I don't know. Do the adoptive parents choose the children or is it the other way around like it is here in the US?

 

Anyway, it may seem weird that she chose the baby, but it's not like she's not helping the other children out in Malawi. She is building orphanages and schools for them.

 

I still don't see why people are criticizing her. It's not my fandom talking either. I am not an Angelina Jolie fan, but I love that she's adopting children and I'll defend her if anyone criticizes her for it, for whatever reason.

Is that how it is Malawi? I don't know. Do the adoptive parents choose the children or is it the other way around like it is here in the US?

 

Anyway, it may seem weird that she chose the baby, but it's not like she's not helping the other children out in Malawi. She is building orphanages and schools for them.

 

I still don't see why people are criticizing her. It's not my fandom talking either. I am not an Angelina Jolie fan, but I love that she's adopting children and I'll defend her if anyone criticizes her for it, for whatever reason.

 

 

So, because she's building orphanages and helping little kids out, it gives her the right to choose a kid like you would choose a puppy at the pet store? Come on.

 

People are criticizing her because there are serious ethical questions being brought up by various groups on how this adoption took place.

Like?

Funny how even when Madonna does a good thing, she gets criticized. Would you rather have a child live in poverty and possibly die of disease than him having his life saved and having a good education?

 

If it is a "trend" to adopt babies, then gee, that's not a bad trend at all. I'd like to take part in it someday too.

 

 

I don't have a problem with people adopting babies. It's how she went about doing it that I find disgusting. Don't you find it disgusting that she sat around for awhile and picked the baby like some dog at a pet store? I do and apparently so do many.

 

I think your fandom is getting in the way of making a reasonable judgement. That is no different than the normal adoption process. :lol

Like?

 

 

:lol

 

She had 12 pictures of babies she deemed "appropriate" sent to her via e-mail and then she made the trip down and watched the kids play for awhile and basically said "I want that one."

 

It's like shopping!

 

It's only been mentioned in my last two posts. :lol

 

Despite Madonna's claim that she had gone through the proper channels in seeking to adopting David, human rights and child protection groups in Malawi were outraged by the apparent speed with which she was able to take custody of the child and planned to challenge the adoption in court to ensure that rules were not bent for the singer simply because of her fame.

 

http://www.hindustantimes.com/news/181_182...01100020015.htm

 

 

Funny how even when Madonna does a good thing, she gets criticized. Would you rather have a child live in poverty and possibly die of disease than him having his life saved and having a good education?

 

If it is a "trend" to adopt babies, then gee, that's not a bad trend at all. I'd like to take part in it someday too.

 

 

I don't have a problem with people adopting babies. It's how she went about doing it that I find disgusting. Don't you find it disgusting that she sat around for awhile and picked the baby like some dog at a pet store? I do and apparently so do many.

 

I think your fandom is getting in the way of making a reasonable judgement. That is no different than the normal adoption process. :lol

 

Does that make it right?

 

These people are human beings, not dogs, cats, or birds.

Then if that's how it is really done, then why pick on Madonna only? In that case, blast everyone who has adopted a child that way.

 

Point is, she's helping a child get a better life. She's also helping other children like I mentioned in my other post, by building schools and orphanages. Is that really so bad?

It comes with celebrity, I doubt QP is only 'attacking' Madonna, its just this is newsworthy, he posted on it because he has an opinion. I doubt he would feel any differently if it was Jane Doe doing it.

Madonna's a face. If I do this, it doesn't make the headlines.

I understand that 100%.

i'm no madonna fan and question her intentions, however the father seemed like he understood what was going on, even if the process was a bit overwhelming

 

the article tries to have a bad slant and the title is horrible, but he seems to be sad at giving up his kid and having his wife and other kids die - confused by the commotion and legal process - but happy that his kid can have a healthy life and possibilities at education - and finally hopeful that his son will stay true to their cultures, visit the village and one day help them out using his new education

 

hopefully madonna realizes the responsibility she has to the father and the village to educate the kid on his roots

 

 

I hope and pray for the kid. Hopefully he doesn't end up being as screwed up as she is. Seems like adopting kids is the new trend in Hollywood, like Kabala and Scientology.

 

I can just picture Madonna in her fake British accent choosing which baby she wanted.

 

 

 

 

 

Please elaborate on how "screwed" up Madonna is.

 

 

Im not hating on you but Im trying to figure out the extent of her screwed-upness.

 

 

The leader of North Korea is screwed up.

 

The suspect(s) that shot that family of 4 on the FL Turnpike are screwed up.

 

 

 

How is Madonna screwed up?

She 'crucified' herself with a gag ball in her mouth.

 

That was so disrespectful to me as a Christian. Mocking/sensationalizing the death of my Lord is pretty damn low.

She 'crucified' herself with a gag ball in her mouth.

 

That was so disrespectful to me as a Christian. Mocking/sensationalizing the death of my Lord is pretty damn low.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Look, Im not saying that I got wood watching her do that on her last tour, but its a freakin act.

 

 

Its also whats so great about our country. If Madonna cant dress up in her tight fitting equestrian outfit, toss a ball gag in her mouth and sing "Live To Tell" on a crucifix then this country (and its freedom of speech) is in a lot of trouble.

She 'crucified' herself with a gag ball in her mouth.

 

That was so disrespectful to me as a Christian. Mocking/sensationalizing the death of my Lord is pretty damn low.

 

In fear of somebody calling me Fox's lackey, I agree 100%.

Fox & Junior, did you watch the entire performance or are you judging by what you saw on TV and photos? Just wondering.

She 'crucified' herself with a gag ball in her mouth.

 

That was so disrespectful to me as a Christian. Mocking/sensationalizing the death of my Lord is pretty damn low.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Look, Im not saying that I got wood watching her do that on her last tour, but its a freakin act.

 

 

Its also whats so great about our country. If Madonna cant dress up in her tight fitting equestrian outfit, toss a ball gag in her mouth and sing "Live To Tell" on a crucifix then this country (and its freedom of speech) is in a lot of trouble.

You wanted reasons why I think she's 'screwed up', personally. In my eyes that act makes someone slightly out of whack. She did it for shock value and to need to take something like that and glam it up for her 'act' is screwed up to me.

 

I didn't say a thing about her not being able to or shouldnt be able to express herself any way she wants so you can check your 1st ammendment rights speech at the door because I didn't and wouldn't go there.