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Kevin Hench... what a Jackass!


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Coker lost team long time ago

Kevin Hench / Special to FOXSports.com

Posted: 12 hours ago


Happy Thanksgiving. You're fired.


In retrospect, maybe it was just never a good idea to have guy named "Coker" overseeing a bunch of college kids in the city that gave us Michael Irvin and Tony Montana.


Admin Coker is gone now, canned by the University of Miami despite edging Boston College, 17-14, on Thursday. The win made the Canes bowl eligible, leaving some selection committee to decide if Miami's big-name stature is worth the 50-50 chance that if they are invited the game will end in a wild, helmet-swinging melee.


Firing Coker was an easy call. He had to go.


When the Miami football team disgraced itself during and, more importantly, after last season's 40-3 humiliation at the hands of LSU in the Peach Bowl, it was clear Coker had lost the team. Had he been shown the door then as he should have been, he could have walked out with a small shred of dignity.


But giving him the keys to the car again in 2006 was like asking Captain Joe Hazelwood to try to pilot the Exxon Valdez back home. The results were frighteningly predictable. And so it was no surprise when the Canes behaved badly, played poorly and lost liberally this season. And it was no surprise when Miami president Donna Shalala whacked Coker Friday with two years left on his contract. It just came 11 months too late.


College football coaches can feign obliviousness in those awkward sideline interviews with attractive blonde correspondents asking if they think they'll be fired, but they know the rules. They haven't changed since Alec Baldwin first outlined them for us.


"As you all know, first prize is a Cadillac Eldorado. Anyone want to see second prize? Second prize is a set of steak knives. Third prize is you're fired."


Coker won the Cadillac his first season in Miami, leading the Canes to the national championship, then got the steak knives in year two after a dubious pass interference call cost him a second national title against Ohio State. But it was all downhill from there, culminating in this season's fourth-place finish (6-6, 3-5) in the ACC's Coastal division.


There are two ways to earn yourself a little latitude as a college football coach and Coker failed in both these respects. If you run a tight ship that doesn't embarrass the university, you can lose a few games here and there. If your team is in the national title hunt every year, the school might overlook an "incident" or two.


But if your team brings shame on the university with repeated unacceptable behavior and it goes 6-6, well, the only steak knife you'll be receiving is the one the school plunges in your chest.


Admin Coker can't say he didn't see it coming. His fate was likely sealed on Oct. 14 when any vestige of control, any sliver of command, was obliterated as his team took on Florida International in an ugly brawl that drew national attention to a program run amok. Florida International! When the University of Miami Hurricanes have slipped so far as to be brawling with Florida International, the firing of the head coach is long overdue.


I don't know if all the king's horses or all the king's men ? or even Rutgers' Greg Schiano ? can put this mess back together again. But the first step in rebuilding this once-mighty program has been taken.


Better late than never.


Maybe I was just in a bad mood when i was reading this but this guy is a f***ing horrible writer. Miami is not the city that brought you Tony Montana, Tony Montana was brought to us by Brian DePalma and the creative writing of Oliver Stone updating an old novel. Now granted Miami wasnt Pleasantville in the eighties, but come on... this guy is a jackass of epic proportions.

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That first line just annoyed me... I've read a couple other articles of his and they are all the same, it seems to me that he is trying to hard to be a smart, quippy writer (like Lebatard, who im not to fond of, but still think is a great writer) and it just turns out to be contrived crap to me.

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