Since he isn't here to defend himself, here are 30 of the harshest things a woman has said to a naked Count Bass D:

 

1. I've smoked fatter joints than that.

2. Ahhhh, it's cute.

3. Why don't we just cuddle?

4. You know they have surgery to fix that.

5. Make it dance.

6. Can I paint a smiley face on it?

7. Wow, and your feet are so big.

8. It's okay, we'll work around it.

9. Will it squeak if I squeeze it?

10. Oh no... I just got a flash headache.

11. (Giggling and pointing)

12. Can I be honest with you?

13. How sweet, you brought incense.

14. This explains your car.

15. Maybe if we water it, it'll grow.

16. Why is God punishing me?

17. At least this won't take long.

18. I never saw one like that before.

19. But it still works, right?

20. It looks so unused.

21. Maybe it looks better in natural light.

22. Why don't we skip right to the cigarettes?

23. Are you cold?

24. If you get me real drunk first.

25. Is that an optical illusion?

26. What is that?

27. It's a good thing you have so many other talents.

28. Does it come with an air pump?

29. So this is why you're supposed to judge people on personality.

30. I guess this makes me the early bird.

Ironically, everybody has said this to your "wife" also.

Ironically, everybody has said this to your "wife" also.

Oh a "your wife" burn! Ouch.

 

 

Have a Twinkie. :lol

Ironically, everybody has said this to your "wife" also.

 

Your mama wears army boots.

Ironically, everybody has said this to your "wife" also.

 

 

 

This is right out of the louisecastillo1 book of comebacks.

Ironically, everybody has said this to your "wife" also.

Oh a "your wife" burn! Ouch.

 

 

Have a Twinkie. :lol

 

Didnt they stop making twinkies?

Thank you, Pacman.

Thank you, Pacman.

Doh! Does this mean I have to change the foil in my joke? :shifty

Ironically, everybody has said this to your "wife" also.

Oh a "your wife" burn! Ouch.

 

 

Have a Twinkie. :lol

 

Didnt they stop making twinkies?

No, your mom just ate them all.