Random Homer Quotes

 

:lol

 

One of my favorites:

 

"If the Bible has taught us nothing else, and it hasn't, its that girls should stick to girl's sports, such as hot oil wrestling foxy boxy and such and such... "

That is awesome! :lol

this is a great one:

"Asleep at the switch? I wasn't asleep, I was drunk!"

"Son, when you participate in sporting events, its not whether you win or loose, its how drunk you get."

Marge, old people don't need companionship, they need to be isolated and studied to see what useful nutrients can be obtained from them...

 

:thumbup

If you really want something in this life, you have to work for it. Now, quiet! The're about to announce the lottery numbers...

"Blame the guy who doesn't speak Engish."

 

"Kill my boss?!? Do I dare live out the american dream?"

 

:lol

If something is too hard,give it up. The moral my boy is too never try anything

"A hundred bucks for a comic book? Who drew it, Michaelmelangelo?"

 

 

"Be quiet, Brain, or I'll stab you with a Q-tip"

 

 

"Life is just one crushing defeat after another until you just wish Flanders was dead."

 

 

"The other day I was so desperate for a beer, I snuck into the football stadium and ate the dirt under the bleachers."

 

 

"Marge! Look at all this great stuff I found at the Marina. It was just sitting in some guy's boat!"

Hello? Operator! Give me the number for 911!

 

Mmmm, free goo!

The best quote by Homer was this one:

 

"To alcohol! The cause of, and solution to, all of life's problems."

Do you want to change your name to Homer, Jr.? The kids can call you Hoju!

 

Facts are meaningless. You could use facts to prove anything that's even remotely true!

 

Ha ha! Look at this country! You are gay!? Ha ha!

 

This perpetual motion machine she made is a joke : It just keeps going faster and faster. Lisa, get in here! In this house, we obey the laws of THERMODYNAMICS!

Those are pretty good... my favorite homer quote is the one in my sig.