hovertical

Easy enough for me. Still refuse to watch any of their games until Bruce spends on the team. Year two of zero games coming in! Woo. Go fuck off and die Bruce.

Meh, i always found him pretty fair for the Marlins honestly. The person I've always noticed absolutely loathes anything Marlins related is Bradford Doolittle - that dude absolutely takes tainted taco bell with magnesium citrate sauce level shits on the Marlins and has done so for ages.

This was per the Athletic - if I recall it was a ranking done by Keith Law. still bottom 1/3 of the league! discuss

You forgot the part where an attendant can be seen in the background carrying Ruiz' arm that was completely torn off his body while the announcement he will be day-to-day is made.

I checked on Snopes and confirmed 7 billion is the correct signing amount.

not only the injury history but last year was the first time he started to finally reign in some of his wildness he's always been notorious for so who knows if that was just a "career" year type of thing or he'll actually keep making progress in that area.

We'll get to see them called up right around the time Eury Perez is due to be traded in the next rebuild

if he blows his elbow out can we refer to him as Baked Alaska?

Looks like it'll be two years straight of refusing to watch a single game. Absolutely will not do it until he invests in the team.

Bruce is looking at all this money being spent for FA's and is clutching his plastic pearls

i said it before on this thread somewhere that he was the one guy i fully expected the Marlins to sign.

I'm not a particularly good looking dude so i will take league minimum to be the offensive face of a franchise.

I was waiting for someone to take the hit and go that route

and what's the Morel of this story?

Did they buy it off Juan Carlos Oviedo?

"Do we have to pay these guys? If so, don't get anyone." - Bruce

Honestly, why not? He's literally not going to use enough money to sign a meaningful bat so you may as well try to get a more proven bp arm by spending less than what a bat would cost. I know bp arms can be volatile but some do have better track records than other one season wonders and they generally cost less than impact bats. To just not spend at all (AGAIN) is fucking stupid - but fully expected.

Color me surprised. (Need the giant Crayola box for that but Bruce can probably only afford Rose Art)

i read those and i found it funny on the sandy one they were basically just like "Yeah he should be traded to the A's" without really going into for whom, etc. just kinda like "yeah they could ask for some prospects or sumfin"

I do totally expect Pete Fairbanks to sign with us though.

it was 100% due to Jeter being attached and nothing else.

Smarslok sounds like the name of an Orc character in Skyrim

"we want to dump Sandy's salary elsewhere but we're super eager to spend money!" sounds about par for the course - they'll move Sandy's salary at a very low rate of return and then "spend" 5 mil for what should be a depth piece but will be an everyday starter.

it was disgusting to see they literally only invested a quarter of their profits back into the team this past season based on that chart someone had posted. For some reason MLB sees zero wrong with this and continues to permit Bruce to just rake in the cash year over year from profit sharing, etc.. I don't expect him to really add anyone of significance this offseason either as we'll likely hear some version of "we really liked what we saw this year and feel like our timeline (to the next rebuild) has been accelerated so we want to see if they can take another step forward this season." And sign a few scrubs, filler, and MAYBE a depth starter like Quantrill was last season. more of the same again and again. Bruce will never spend.

Jazz should send him a pair of autographed shoes as a gift