cgator

Honus Wagner Ernie Banks

Rogers Hornsby, hands down.

Little Johnny's neighbors had a baby. Unfortunately, the baby was born without ears. When mother and new baby came home from the hospital, Johnny's family was invited over to see the baby. Before they left their house, Little Johnny's dad had a talk with him and explained that the baby had no ears. His dad also told him that if he so much as mentioned anything about the baby's missing ears or even said the word ears he would get the spanking of his life when they came back home. Little Johnny told his dad he understood completely. When Johnny looked in the crib he said, "What a beautiful baby." The mother said, "Why, thank you, Little Johnny." Johnny said, "He has beautiful little feet and beautiful little hands, a cute little nose and really beautiful eyes." "Can he see?" asked Little Johnny. "Yes", the mother replied, "we are so thankful; the Doctor said he will have 20/20 vision." "That's great", said Little Johnny, "cuz he'd be sh*t outta luck if he needed glasses."

I gaurentee you Super Bowl XXIX will end with a 49-26 score. I wonder why it hasn't ended yet. 665107[/snapback] I am happy people get my joke. Look at the name of this thread really carefully. :plain 665541[/snapback] Why? Whats wrong with it? :mischief2 :whistle

And so it comes to a close... Last pick 'em for the season is an easy one, only having to concentrate on one game. And here it is: Sunday, Feb. 6 New England vs. Philadelphia (6:30 p.m. on FOX) Good Luck!!

Updates are now posted HERE.

A young boy went up to his father and asked him, "Dad, what is the difference between potentially and realistically?" The father thought for a moment, then answered, "Go ask your mother if she would sleep with Robert Redford for a million dollars. Then ask your sister if she would sleep with Brad Pitt for a million dollars; and then, ask your brother if he'd sleep with Tom Cruise for a million dollars. Come back and tell me what you learn from that." So the boy went to his mother and asked, "Would you sleep with Robert Redford for a million dollars?" The mother replied, "Of course I would! We could really use that money to fix up the house and send you kids to a great University!" The boy then went! to his sister and asked, "Would you sleep with Brad Pitt for a million dollars?" The girl replied, "Oh my God! I LOVE Brad Pitt! I would sleep with him in a heartbeat, are you nuts?!?!?" The boy then went to his brother and asked, "Would you sleep with Tom Cruise for a million dollars?" "Of course," the brother replied. "Do you know how much a million could buy?" The boy pondered the answers for a few days, then went back to his dad. His father asked him, "Did you find out the difference between potentially and realistically?" The boy replied, "Yes, Sir. Potentially, you and I are sitting on three million dollars..............but realistically,......... we're living with two sluts and a queer."

29th it is: Herald.com Posted on Fri, Jan. 14, 2005 LOCAL ROUNDUP Dawson to play in Joe DiMaggio Game From Herald Wire Reports Former major leaguers Andre Dawson, George Foster and Dennis Martinez are just three of many retired baseball stars who will return to the field at the 17th Annual Joe DiMaggio Legends Game. The event, a fundraiser for the Joe DiMaggio Children's Hospital Foundation, is 7 p.m. Jan. 29 at Fort Lauderdale Stadium. Dawson, a Miami native and Florida Marlins special assistant, was an eight-time All-Star, won eight Gold Gloves and was the National League's most valuable player in 1987. Foster, also a league MVP, was an important cog in Cincinnati's ''Big Red Machine'' of the 1970s when he led the major leagues in RBI three consecutive seasons. Martinez, a Miami resident who pitched a perfect game in 1991, won more games (245) than any Latin American pitcher in baseball history. The three will join more than 50 former major-league players and celebrities to raise money for the DiMaggio hospital's pediatric oncology unit that features 20 private patient rooms, a pharmacy, treatment and consultation rooms. The unit also offers family space, a play area and terrace. 'This is truly a `field of dreams' scenario, both in terms of the money raised for sick children and the memories rekindled by the reappearance of these beloved ballplayers,'' said Dr. Gary Birken, chairman of the Joe DiMaggio Children's Hospital Foundation. ``No matter what your age, the Legends Game will bring out the kid in you.'' Stan Bahnsen, Paul Blair, Bert Campaneris, Jose Cardenal, Rico Carty, Warren Cromartie, Mike Cuellar, Alvin Dark, Tommy Davis, Orestes Destrade, Al Downing, Oscar Gamble, Wayne Garrett, Elrod Hendricks, Willie Horton, Clyde King, Ed Kranepool, Bill Lee, Phil Linz, Elliott Maddox, Minnie Minoso, John ''Blue Moon'' Odom, Amos Otis, Jimmy Piersall, Cookie Rojas, Manny Sanguillen, Art Shamsky, Ron Swoboda, Jose Tartabull and Tom Tresh are some of the other legends scheduled to appear. Fort Lauderdale Stadium is at 5301 NW 12th Ave., just west of I-95 and north of Commercial Boulevard. Reserved seats are $5. For information or to purchase tickets call 954-985-3454.

A blind man enters a "Ladies Bar" by mistake. He finds his way to a bar stool and orders a drink. After sitting there for a while, he yells to the bartender, "Hey, you wanna hear a blonde joke?" The bar immediately falls absolutely quiet. In a very deep, husky voice, the woman next to him says, "Before you tell that joke, sir, I think it is just fair (given that you are blind) that you should know five things: 1. The bartender is a blonde girl. 2. The bouncer is a blonde girl. 3. I'm a 6 feet tall, 220 lb. blonde woman with a black belt in karate. 4. The woman sitting next to me is blonde and is a professional weight lifter. 5. The lady to your right is a blonde and is a professional wrestler. Now think about it seriously,! Mister. Do you still wanna tell that joke?" The blind man thinks for a second, shakes his head and declares, "Nah....Not if I'm gonna have to explain it five times."

146 guests, 4 members 0 anonymous members 146 guests at 6 AM??? :blink: Something just isn't right.

For those of you scouting around this thread trying to see who is in the lead, I decided to make it easier for you. Standings for this game can now be found together with the Pick 'em standings in the Running Totals thread.

Have a great one!!

Have a Sterling day!

It is winding down. Pick the Conference Champions who will play each other in the Super Bowl. Conference Championships Sunday, January 23, 2005 Atlanta at Philadelphia, 3:00 p.m. on FOX New England at Pittsburgh, 6:30 p.m. on CBS Good Luck!!

These results will be added to the RUNNING TOTALS thread in a little while. DetroitWhat and DTrainFan were the only ones to go 4-0 this week (not that anyone did it last week :o )

Anyways, people shouldn't be punished for their stupidity, it's not their fault. 657291[/snapback] Actually, I think people should be punished for their stupidity. It is only fair, their stupidity has been punishing me for years.

Okay, its time to start Admin's sweatshop. Just make transfers on the computer. Go down to the local store and get t-shirts in all sizes and colors (4 for $5 , $1 more for 2x,) and put Joe to work transferring the logo to the shirts. Your overhead is cheaper, the shirt wears out faster so there will be more repeat orders, and Joe is going to need to save up some cash for when he starts running into all those parked cars.

How about a Admin the Webmaster Teddybear. Could wear a little MB.com tee. On second thought, the hat and mousepad ideas work for me.

A Admin appreciation thread....... awww, how sweet.

I be "The Man". 652995[/snapback] Some have seriously questioned that claim.

How the hell do you people have that many posts in a day? 652466[/snapback] :spam :spam :spam +1

And now, the week 2 postseason pick 'em. Choose the winners for this weekend's Divisional Playoff Games. The thread will be closed around the 4:30 kickoff time on Saturday. Saturday, Jan. 15 4:30 p.m. on CBS N.Y. Jets at Pittsburgh 8:00 p.m. on FOX St. Louis at Atlanta Sunday, Jan. 16 1:00 p.m. on FOX Minnesota at Philadelphia 4:30 p.m. on CBS Indianapolis at New England Good Luck!!

Yeah, I'm near the top! 652159[/snapback] Yeah, with a 2-2 record. Its like being in the NFC

Postseason Pick 'em Player - W - L Mordy Is God - 9 - 2 DtrainFan - 6 - 5 DetroitWhat - 6 - 4 Mabdul_Doobakus - 6 - 5 UMFan4Life7 - 6 - 5 floridafan13 - 5 - 6 The Mike Mordecai Experience - 5 - 6 TealMonster - 5 - 6 chewbacca314 - 5 - 6 Admin - 5 - 6 fritz - 5 - 6 The Rebirth - 5 - 6 ncmarlin - 5 - 6 CFDodgeMarlin40 - 5 - 6 WildMarlinMan2003 - 4 - 1 freshy - 4 - 7 FishFanInPA - 4 - 7 bman8316 - 4 - 7 Beastie boi - 3 - 1 Heckeroo - 3 - 4 Maverick - 3 - 5 Flamarlins3 - 3 - 7 marlins - 2 - 2 flying_mollusk - 2 - 2 fishfan25 - 2 - 2 24Tino - 2 - 2 phlub - 2 - 3 PhishPhan - 2 - 3 chefbob - 2 - 5 Shaq-Man - 1 - 3 Postseason Confidence Picks Player - Points Mordy is God - 25 PhishPhan - 21 Admin - 20 WildMarlinMan2003 - 20 The Rebirth - 19 Fritz - 18 UMFan4Life7 - 12 Chefbob - 11 CFDodgeMarlin40 - 11 DTrainFan - 11 Phlub - 11 Capefish - 9 Mabdul Doobakus - 9 FishFanInPA - 9 floridafan13 - 8 Beinfest4Prez - 7 TealMonster - 7 Flamarlins3 - 7 bman8316 - 7 Flying_Mollusk - 6 Sandroimbuto - 5 Chewbacca314 - 5 Maverick - 4 MarlinsPhenom - 3 Shaq-Man - 3 Updated as of February 7, 2005

If this week is any indication, it is going to be a llloooooonnnngggg post season for many of you :mischief